THE WOES OF A MOURNING MOTHER

Female infanticide; a common practice years ago. But a baby is still a baby, isn’t it? How would a momma have felt when she was the victim of such a terrible crime? A humble take. Read on…

Yesterday, I thought, would be the happiest day of my life

To arrive, this had taken ten months of yen

With days of being pampered and praised,

The final day had actually arrived…

Excitement, anxiousness and elation, 

A myriad of all emotions, and pain;

A flash of searing pain, 

And then the soft cries of my baby for which I could bear the pain a million times,

A girl it is, they exclaim! I smile with pride and joy at my pretty princess,

Hold her tiny fingers, make an unspoken promise

To hold her close and protect her forever,

And sleep engulfs me.

Excitement and concern wake me up, and I search for my angel, 

Only to find the crib empty near me

I panic; call for help, and am told that the child is no more.

Tears welling up I start to yell, and writhe;

I feel nothing but a sharp sting, and darkness all over again

Early, so early I wake up, 

With such emptiness in me almost like physical hurt

I try to find solace in my tears, 

Tears for the unfulfilled dreams, for the lost soul, for the darling daughter she was to be..

I drift off again and wake up to see my husband’s face peering at me

I search into his eyes to find a vicious gleam,

 You should have given me a son, he says

What about the daughter I gave birth to, my heart questions;

My eyes implore into his, and I am consoled

Consoled that I am still young and have a long life to GIVE many more sons 

If only his grandmother had felt that, his living soul would not have been there to say this;

My heart throbs and my unstopping tears make me gasp

Reality seems surreal, the only thing I hear are wails

Wails of an ignorant little soul so blatantly murdered;

A million questions arise; why me? Why the dear innocent baby?

Would death be the only way to overcome this? Would I even be able to?

At a point my tears stop, I feel numb

Numb of all the emotions I held in the past two days,

I glare at my husband with impassive eyes

I have nothing but a silent prayer at heart;

Dear God, please let no woman ever suffer this agony, and

May such haughty men realise the value, beauty and the joy of a girl child.